![MillerCoors will no longer make caffeinated “Sparks,” “Sparks Plus,” “Sparks Light,” or any other alcoholic energy drinks ever again.
If I may say a few words…
Sparks, you were a terrible drink. You tasted kind of like cough syrup. To the uninitiated, you made no sense. To most, you still don’t make any sense. You stained my tongue orange. I may have lost the respect of several of my friends on your account.
And I’m going to miss you.
[Cue “End of the Road” or some other Boyz II Men jawn]
On the plus side, this means no more Sparks Light. Go fuck yourself, Sparks Light.](http://29.media.tumblr.com/XEEr1SsllhndlafepajpkrPMo1_400.jpg)
MillerCoors will no longer make caffeinated “Sparks,” “Sparks Plus,” “Sparks Light,” or any other alcoholic energy drinks ever again.
If I may say a few words…
Sparks, you were a terrible drink. You tasted kind of like cough syrup. To the uninitiated, you made no sense. To most, you still don’t make any sense. You stained my tongue orange. I may have lost the respect of several of my friends on your account.
And I’m going to miss you.
[Cue “End of the Road” or some other Boyz II Men jawn]
On the plus side, this means no more Sparks Light. Go fuck yourself, Sparks Light.
